I had a vision..

I have got over my phase of viewing reruns of episodes of my favourite superhero- Superman. However somewhere in the subconscious he still dwells….and probably that was why I recently dreamt of having X-ray vision. Now, one wouldn’t want to ponder on what are the advantages..ahem of having this peculiar boon but this has definitely made me open my eyes to the vision, I lack (leave alone X-ray; I don’t have the normal night vision too). I hear that constant cackle of complaints around me against bad haircuts, dentist nightmares or for the matter of fact- the chubby syndrome( a polite term for the obese). I on the other hand feel as if the whole world around me is a bad television.

Having stuck in this myopic stage since a tender age; my eyes have been caged behind frames of a myriad kind. Having a deep disgust and disregard for them, my ‘callousness’ ensured that they never lasted too long(read: losing them in water; I guess you wouldn't want the details.... or getting repeatedly smacked on the face till they fall off etc etc..) How I wished it was the same with the ‘geek’ and ‘nerd’ name-calling.

And as I broke another pair and ruined my lenses(unintentionally of course ; wink) I realized it had its advantages too…

1.       You can always look through certain unwanted entities and if confronted can blame it on bad vision.

2.       You can avoid work (people ‘politely’ refuse to let you carry things around, college blackboard not visible=no need to take down notes).

3.       Source of pity…a way to get attention (you need to squint in an orderly fashion to convince).

However my reader’s will agree with me that nothing’s better than to see the world in its full colour and grandeur with the miracle that has been bestowed upon us…as Ruskin Bond truly puts it…”The eyes have it”.

Gossip Girl(s)

I've been living in the hostel for almost three years now and I thought it worth my while to document a widespread affliction amongst girls viz. gossiping. Now, the dictionary defines gossip as "casual or unconstrained conversation or reports about other people, typically involving details that are not confirmed as being true", but in the hostel it becomes much more.
Now, the victims of gossip are of myriad kinds, but the ones who act "too big for their shoes" or the ones who are oh-so "la-di-dah" are the preferred ones. Any girl with exceptionally good hair or a flawless complexion or an attractive physique or anything remotely good about her will undoubtedly become the butt of various speculative conversations, the main aim of which is, without exception, to list her hitherto non-existent "flaws". So, somebody with good hair might actually be talking to 4 different boys at odd times during the night, information courtesy "the girl's room-mate's friend's room-mate's sister who is a junior and is living nowhere close to the girl in question" , but surprisingly we are ready to believe such a "reliable" source with such vicious faith - its actually quite cruel. In fact, there's nothing more macabre than watching a group of girls gossiping away to glory, the result being that somebody who was "miss goody-two-shoes" till yesterday might now be referred to as a "wolf in sheep's skin". You have good skin? - you must definitely be having exceptionally intolerable B.O. ; you have a good dressing sense?- it obviously means you have an attitude problem; have a good physique?- liposuction anyone?; you get good grades? - you use people as a ladder to get to the top; you name it - they have something on you to bring you down. Now, you might be thinking that gossiping is limited to those out to get each other - you could not be more wrong! Its amazing how much your best friend talks about you behind your back and rest assured - she's not eulogising you. I have to hand it to such girls though - the kind of things they can gauge just by giving you a cursory glance - "oh the one with the silver earrings? Yeah, she's a kleptomaniac" - they don't even know your name yet. So, this is an ode to all those girls who gossip to spice up their otherwise monotonous lives - character-assasination being their sport of choice!

Nikhita

The Inside Story

As part of the college magazine team I have been working on some editorials for the past month.During the course of putting together various articles and scrapping away quite a few(read: tearing my hair over them),I decided to put up one article which has been inspired by most of my own experiences as well as inputs from my enthusiastic friends.I gave the title as The Inside Story...

THE   INSIDE   STORY

 

Here’s to a different take on what actually occupies the inner recesses of the mind of students during lectures, labs and seminars at our college( or I should rightly state that “the general trend observed in that similar species called engineering college goe-er’s”;  wink).

The precautionary tagline comes henceforth as the picture does not seem too rosy .The sea of students who appear…mind; just appear to be engulfing knowledge are actually  being bogged down with some pretty disturbing thoughts. After having spoken to a good number of students( who of course want their identity to remain anonymous) I jotted down a few  of their ponderings……

 

 

@ Lectures

Lectures mean a lot to our students and when I approached them with this question the responses that I got….

 

1.       “Excuse me???? What??!!!”

(Apparently suffered from the temporary ‘ I am ignoring you by acting deaf’ syndrome..hehe)

2.       “OFF; OFF; OFF!!!!”

(That anthem which soothes the ears.Wonder how the chaotic noise from different sources at different pitches, sound to that one silent , dignified source which receives it??????)

3.       “Yawn!! If Sir walks this way wake me up..”

(Read: My eyelids won’t remain open even if I  crowbarred toothpicks into them.

Conclusion: Bachi hui(or not) neend ko pura karna)

4.       “Why has the attendance sheet not been circulated till now?”

(After all, a platform to exercise new handwriting styles..hope you caught the drift.)

5.       “I am a little loaded today…Aye please take it off …21 ki proxy laga na!!!!

(That effervescent personality comes bubbling to the surface at this point of time.The most awaited activity during.. or wait!! Should I say at the end of the lectures.)

6.       “Oh yaar!! Roll no. nikal gaya….maam; maam”

(For those beauties who went the snoring way)

7.       “Hollywood-Bollywood, Bingo,  Zero-Crosses, Name-Place-Animal-Thing, Sudoku”

(Yipee!!! Recreation hour.)

8.       “ Pass the journal sheets.(By whispering or via chit system.)”

(Rate of writing is directly proportional to rate of speaking of the lecturer in class.)

9.       X: - “Bluetooth on kar na.”

Y: - “Can’t you wait a minute. I am texting.”

(Proven: - The cellphone ought not to be exposed to children; snigger)

10.   V: - “I didn’t understand this particular equation”

(Grinding teeth; the one who is accidently paying attention in class today)

W: - “Which unit is going on?”

(Grinding teeth ;Grinding chalk and giving murderous glares to V.)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

@ Labs

Labs are crucial. So we found our correspondents a little sober and grim but they assured us that there have been and will be good old memories…

 

1.       “Kya karna hai? What is going on? What is this scary looking equipment?”

(The usual clueless state. I am willing to assume it as lack of sleep.)

2.       “Do bunk ho gaye; pause for harassed look; will I be there in defaulters?”

(Something to converse upon since the experiments are nowhere near to penetrating the head.)

3.       “Cut, Copy, Paste.”

(Comp to comp or pendrive to comp…stealthily or unabashedly.)

4.       “Two hours…groan!!! Stomach is grumbling.”

(For the foodie, who is currently drooling over her fantasy puff from the canteen.)

5.       “That bright sun; the clouds so white; that blue bird.”

( Nature and technology in sync. Read: experiment is still not penetrating the head.)

6.       “Patch cord tails!!!!  hehe”

(Experiment just refuses to enter the head.)

7.       “The hands of the clock move so slowly!!!!”

( To blame on universal laws and curse the general fate.)

8.       “ Why  are so many corrections in journals given?”

(Makes you get up from your unfinished sleep and mutter curses under your breath. As it is you are not able to configure the experiment and are depending on some reliable source. So this provides ample time pass for two hours.)

9.       “ Maam excuse me from the lab. It is urgent.”

( With a spring in the step our person visits the washroom, empties and refills the water bottles and does general time pass in front of the notice-boards.)

10.   M: -“Copy maar na readings; teach me later on how we went about it.”

N : - “Maam told me to press this button and that; toh phir kar diya(sheepish grin).

(Conclusion: - Bang your head on the wall. Experiment has not been understood by any living soul in the lab, even the reliable source.)

Black

I've blacked out.

The inner recesses of my mind has been bogged with black for sometime now.As the world whirls past me,the black stays,like a blur,reflecting a deep thought in my black eyes.

I run my fingers along my black locks thinking of the times when I have felt elevated listening to Pearl Jam's 'Black'. The rhythm, so strong,Vedder's voice so powerful, that it takes me into the black realms and when I close my eyes the world vanishes into oblivion.

And sometimes when darkness falls and it is black, I see myself in fear.Fear of the unknown,yet to come or the past which creeps along like a venomous snake.

The time when the world is at my feet and smiling to myself, all I can see is the black beyond;untouched and yet to be conquered.

When the void,the vaccum brings about serenity in the soul or the mourning which cleaves the mind to fragments.The world captured in black which mystifies its very being.The silence and the chaos.

The black which sometimes  makes me radiate the positive, empowers me.

Pearl Jam's Black

Sheets of empty canvas 

Untouched sheets of clay 
Were laid spread out before me 
As her body once did 
All five horizons 
Revolved around her soul 
As the earth to the sun 
Now the air I tasted and breathed 
Has taken a turn 
Ooh and all I taught her was everything 
Ooh I know she gave me all that she wore 
And now my bitter hands 
Chafe beneath the clouds 
Of what was everything 
Oh the pictures have 
All been washed in black 
Tattooed everything 
I take a walk outside 
I'm surrounded by 
Some kids at play 
I can feel their laughter 
So why do I sear 
Oh, and twisted thoughts that spin 
Round my head 
I'm spinning 
Oh, I'm spinning 
How quick the sun can, drop away... 
And now my bitter hands 
Cradle broken glass 
Of what was everything 
All the pictures had 
All been washed in black 
Tattooed everything 

All along I lived in a rainbow world,bright and sunny loving all the hues which made life so colourful. But somewhere I forgot the 'hueless', the one which brings with it the completeness.

 

Don't take back the city from me...

The wails reached his ears.He could no longer wait.He looked over to his wife , then sprang to his feet and proceeded towards the room with a spring in his step.His happiness knew no bounds...

FLASHBACK:

17th July 1988 1:32 pm

As the monsoon drenched the city high and low, somewhere in a ward in Nobel Hospital,Indore a lineage had continued.Ramachandran looked on and on at the new arrival,at the tightly shut eyes,tightened fist and miniscule fingers.He then twirled his fingers around the jet black locks of the baby; feeling exalted.His first grandchild,born in the city which saw his whole life....

FORWARD:

I, Mallika was born in Indore.

Indore with its Chappan dukan,Palasia,Meghdoot and Rajwada.

With its 'pakwaan' and sweets.

With the plateaus,the black soil underneath the feet and the rains.

With abundant cotton and cloth.

With a blend of the north and the south.

Indore with its thriving zeal.

There is a lot more to it which never catches my eye and probably I might never be able to fathom as well as my grandfather does.

For him it is his life, a part of his soul,embodiment of his spirit.

It was in 1966 when my grandfather decided to finally settle down in Indore.With his work at the textile mills and his children to be educated,he lay down the foundation for his love for the city. My grandmother, a devout, godfearing woman left her home deep down in Kerala to settle down with her husband.Something that she still talks about with a sparkle in her eyes is the way visitors used to throng their household and how she practically spent the entire day cooking three course South Indian meals.The youngest of her children( my aunt) walked her first steps in Indore.My mother ran about in her frocks in the city's gardens; her brothers chasing wildly after her.The very city whose Bum kachori waala brought about yelps of delight from the four children.(My uncle is still very nostalgic about it).When my mother and her sister fought their cold sisterly wars while bicycling through the lanes of Palasia.( One such incident led to my mother falling in the gutter..something for which she still holds a grudge against her sister).And then it was time to go to college;where the typical 'goondas' followed the sisters around.Or where my grandmother sang away to glory; her canatic music so appreciated that she got her break in radio and got covered by media.A place where she was afraid that her immense talent would get stagnant,she strived not only to keep the music in her alive but pass the knowledge down to generations.Where my grandfather was one of the pioneers of the South Indian Association and chaired the association's school.The city which not only gave them fame and respect but also a lot of love.

They faced a lot of hardships. His job.Their health.Their children moving away one by one,getting married.But there was never a time in 20 years when the thought crossed their minds to wrap up their lives in Indore and move in with their children.

My mother got married first.She made me an Indorian...My aunt's first child, my cousin Divya was also born in Nobel hospital exactly after a year I was born.Our favourite holiday spot was to be in Indore, among the milling crowd, among the hundred's of my grandparents' friends.

I am finding it difficult to type anymore.This past year I have had some very difficult moments.My grandfather who has been battling with cancer for sometime now came for a major surgery to Delhi.

The fact that he is unwell gives me nightmares.But the other day he mumbled,tired and exhausted, to my mother, to give away their house in Indore.

My mother got almost tongue tied as she told me this, gathering courage from within her which on the other hand was yelling away in protest.

I held the reciever and my mother's voice drifted in,trying to explain to me how they were too weak to go back now.I felt a knot in my throat,my eyes cringed and blinked too much and as I faced reality, I cried, cried like I had never before. They are probably never going back and living their lives as they used to.

And now as I wipe away the stray tear that had fallen while I was typing, I  feel remorse for my home for I might never find it to be the same place again.....   

MALLUISM

It's wait for it....

This post goes out to the one who coined this phenomenon..(Anu)

Too much addiction to something leads to hazardous consequences( I wonder what course of action I will take) anyway...she has lately been obsessed with the tv sitcom How I met your mother.( The more I see it,the more I adore Barney and find Lily and Marshall irritating a la Ross and Rachael as aforementioned by Nikhita in the post Whatup!?.As for Anu she has probably seen..(I have lost count) some of the episodes again and again and AGAIN...12th of second season,last of second season etc etc..The phenomenon probably sprung up from the sitcom,which is my guess.

And so my name was used as a verb a la ' poor Ted ' . Some of the conversations in which my name..ahem pet name featured in were-

1."Why are you looking so Mallued?"     :

When someone enters into the dream state mode and gets cut off from the conversation.

2. " Don't be such a Mallu about it"        :  

When someone gets particular and particular and  PARTICULAR and finicky.

3. "Mallu wali baat kar di na yaar!!!"     :  

OK this is getting embarrassing. I am feeling the heat now.

 For someone who enters into idiosyncracy.

Enough of getting myself butchered on a public site.As I was saying Anu after having suffered the 'pains' of tolerating me in my full blown element(read: irritating her on purpose.I seem to derive inane pleasure out of it;pause for devilish grin;and secretly I know she finds my nautankis cute) 

MALLUISM  was born.

And it has become a way of life for my friends..live life a la Mallika style.(snigger!!)

PS:- Even though I know that things seem wrong when I am not addressed as Mallu but, but....rolling my eyes. 

Not your rolling wheels....part III

And the final installment..

It has been nearly 6 years( yes that long!!) since I rode the Kinetic and somehow I never seemed to miss it or have pangs of longing, looking at others( even though my sister has had the fun of her life riding her's.Read: crashing into backside of cows and donkeys!! true story)

On a more serious note, I realized I needed a bike, when I came to Pune for my studies.Every one had it( and I did not succumb to peer pressure) but when the rates for taking a rick skyrocketed( It's also quite tedious to travel by bus) I decided to plead to my father( read: fight, argue and try to get my way).

But as you have gone through the past two reads,it is not easy to get my way around dad.

And I end up walking most of the time( at least the nearby places)I trust in it more strongly than ever now.

So daddy felt bad that maybe I was getting deprived of certain opportunities.

This led to waking me up at 6  in the morning on the first day of my after the semester holiday,in the freezing Delhi winter( and when I enquired grumpily, he answered about wanting to take me out for a morning walk???!!!!) After much protest and a rebellious fight he got me out of the house for his walk(!!!???)

All wrapped up in woollens I reached the porch of my house to find a car waiting with a vacant driver's seat and my father sitting beside it smiling a toothy grin.

Of course I was excited,apprehensive.It was an amalgam of emotions.I took to steering the wheel and maybe it was the first time I felt like I was flying.

The days went by...After I got the hang of the clutch and the break, the real test awaited me. It was no more '6 in the morning' drives for me( thank god!!!). It was worse.Now I took out the vehicle at 6 in the evening( boohoo).

Believe me; it was worse than my bicycle lessons and kinetic lessons.I thought  I was good at multi tasking but this??

The clutch.Gear change,clutch,break,accelerator,slow speed-gearchange.Clutch.Speed breaker,gear change,clutch.Crawling slowly in traffic jams.Rearview mirror,sideview mirrror!!People swerving past,changing lanes( which is irritating,even though they know you are a learner).

And dad not meting out; shouting out instructions( it's the most difficult when he teaches how to drive the car).

The finale' is yet to come...

It was two days before I left for Pune and dad caught me casting a longing look over to his car.I had never driven it and truthfully, was scared of it. Magnum Optra was huge and unpredictable to a rookie.

My father coaxed me to take it on.( read: getting butchered).

It ended with me crashing in on three cars at the same time.

( wait for it..though this was a spoiler..I must admit, with apologies to my not so modest nature, that I drove 6-7 kms beautifully(reversing,parking,u turns etal) and the one thing that my dad had not taught me...

YES ! and if you haven't guessed by now- THE SLOPE driving using the handbrake and once I neared the gates to my home, I could'nt get it over the ramp and there it goes.I end up giving scratches to three huge cars.My father averted further bankrupting damages by pulling the handbrakes on time.For the first time in my driving experience he grinned back. Maybe he was expecting it...I still cannot fathom what he thought.I got ripped off by my mother.My conscience torn to shreds.)

And here I am back in Pune now longing to take the car( magnum flies, literally!) on the highway.I had to learn the difficult way and this time round it will stay for sometime to come...

I am not your rolling wheels.....

I am the highway.

Mallika